Frequent attacks of migraine since I was 13 years old, vertigo to the extent that I would just fall off trying to get off my bed. Unbearable stress within leading to multiple health issues from breathlessness, chest pain to suspected blood clot in my heart. Multiple scans, frequent and wasteful trips to hospitals for several years. I was prescribed 20 tablets for morning and 15 for night by famous neuros. Eternal gastric trouble. I would take hours to eat as it just wouldn't get down my throat since my childhood. Broken relationships, tanned and torn trusts, frustrated heart, suicide attempts, almost on the verge of a collapse. This is just a fraction of what I was going through until I got initiated by Sadhguru himself for Shambhavi Mahamudra in 2011. Within three months of regular practice, all these health problems simply vanished. I did a programme called bhava spandana in 2011 dec with Isha and It transformed me into someone who carried no grudge or ill feeling for anyone whom I felt were responsible for my misery till then. I realised that I alone am responsible for my misery or joy. In the last 5 years after I got associated with isha, all the challenges, whether it was lack of money to manage myself and my child all by myself when my salaries were delayed (I had my siblings and close friends who were always willing to support, yet, it was not easy to accept the fact that I had to depend and trouble others to get going) when I had no one to take care of her after school hours while I was at work striving to earn for survival, isha yoga made me go through everything gracefully and joyfully (quite amazingly) and I experienced how support came from unbelievable sources at times...Today after 5+ years of practice, quite miraculously, I am happily settled with my loving husband again, living a life filled with contentment and joy that can never be expressed in words. I am blessed with the clarity and ability to handle any situation without making judgement about either the situation or the people involved. The way I experience life today has changed immensely and quite intensely to say the least. The way I respond to my child, my friends , my mother in law or even my maid has changed dramatically. And this is not what I am saying. This is what they are all telling me!!! I saw my cravings and compulsiveness dropping off naturally. I can't even articulate the transformation I have undergone within me that is leading me to experience life the way I am experiencing today. I have grown within from an absolutely miserable and stressed being into a joyful self. Though there is still a long way to go... I am what I am today because of grace of my master. I can see myself constantly evolving and aware of my mistakes and faults, thus helping me to act as appropriate. Even if I dedicated my life, there is no way I can repay what isha has bestowed upon me. It's unfortunate to see false allegations on a "movement" , A silent and subtle revolution! (Calling it an "organisation" actually does not do any justice) that has transformed so many millions of lives. It only strengthens our determination to work more intensely and quickly as isha volunteers to go and spread what we have experienced. It's more evident now that we have no time to waste and that we must focus all our energies towards Sadhguru's vision to provide these wonderful and powerful tools to every single human being that can transform their lives and themselves towards well being. Isha did not change or force me. Isha simply transformed me and enabled me to become graceful and do what's appropriate always, no matter what kind of force I face along my journey.
NamO namaha shri guru pAdukAbhyAm
#MyStoryWithIsha
Posting below what was pouring out of me as I experienced life after my association with isha when I was still on my own with my child.
Saturday, August 24, 2013 Gracefully YOURS forever
In fear, I fell at YOUR feet helplessly
Giving up in anguish and sad like never
Wandering in the tides, weeping in the deep woods
Lost like a dry leaf that swayed to a terrible whither!!
YOU picked me up in YOUR arms just like a mother
Held me so close that I felt your bosom touch me like a soft feather
The warmth and the love YOU showered saved me from the horror
of the day and the night and the climate and the weather
Oh! Can I ever count the blessings that YOU shower?
Unconditional and Timeless, yet on time and in chime
How beautifully you craft our lives, that I truly wonder!
I rejoice in your lap, like a small child that has played never
I have nothing to seek, nothing to pray for any longer
For I live now and will live on with YOUR grace forever and ever...
Giving up in anguish and sad like never
Wandering in the tides, weeping in the deep woods
Lost like a dry leaf that swayed to a terrible whither!!
YOU picked me up in YOUR arms just like a mother
Held me so close that I felt your bosom touch me like a soft feather
The warmth and the love YOU showered saved me from the horror
of the day and the night and the climate and the weather
Oh! Can I ever count the blessings that YOU shower?
Unconditional and Timeless, yet on time and in chime
How beautifully you craft our lives, that I truly wonder!
I rejoice in your lap, like a small child that has played never
I have nothing to seek, nothing to pray for any longer
For I live now and will live on with YOUR grace forever and ever...
